Monday, August 31, 2009

HAVING A TOTAL GEEK-GASM!!!!! (Following a weekend of wallowing self-reflection....)

I found on THIS Tarot deck!!!

I was so excited I emailed the creator to ask if they'd let me know when they'd found a publisher....and they wrote back saying they HAD FOUND ONE!!!! It's at the publisher, now!!!

I can't wait to get a copy. I also want this deck , but haven't heard back from the creator in awhile to know where they are in its process. Tarot decks take awhile.

In other news, George and I had a great shoot this weekend with our Page and Knight of Swords. My next obstacle is finding locations for the last two major shoots.

This weekend was rough as I was deeply feeling my loss. I slept a lot, waiting for the Gods to explain Themselves and why They so swiftly took away something I thought was meant for me. I didn't find that answer, but I took a wonderful walk with my HP to the cloisters, where we both reconnected with each other and the soil of Manhattan. I was suddenly thankful for where I've been placed and for the gifts around me.

I wrote this morning on the subway that I feel like I'm clutching broken shards of a jar that once held something I loved deeply--but the contents are long gone and I suddenly don't quite remember what the jar held, only that what was in there was for a time all I wanted in the world. Maybe it's good that I can't remember what it smelled, felt and tasted like. Maybe I don't want to remember.

But then I realized that I was crying over a void and maybe I should be happy that I can fill the void with whatever I choose. So I stopped crying and wrote some erotica. That saved the day.

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